After my girlfriends and I got together for a social talk on natural hair – I realised I had done a great disservice to my two daughters. I had been so careful with them developing a good image of their black heritage – refusing to buy them baby dolls locally (all white) until I travelled abroad and found black baby dolls. Yet I neglected their hair, for MY convienence I had their hair permed. At the time of the talk their hair was turning brown, the front line was disappearing from all the hair plaiting and lack of treatment.
The real challenge then started – it was shocking how opinionated 6 and 7 year old girls can be. I got so much resistance for my new hair plan for them. Homemade conditioners etc are a complete no no for my girls’. Sometimes if you make it a project for them like making the conditioner they accept it better. They are at that age when cooking is the greatest achievement even when it’s just frying an egg.
Then when I decided to cut off the permed hair ends – they revolted and got their Dad involved. I had to get his permission and understanding on the benefits of natural hair for them. They so desperately wanted long hair and cutting it was the last thing they wanted to hear.
Well were I could coax I did, where I could insist I did, and I also resorted to blackmail to get them into the new hair plan. Almost a year later – the younger now has thick healthly almost black hair growing longer each day – her brothers had previously teased her mercilessily over her brown hair. The older had thick hair -the biggest change for her is the softness now that conditioning is a regular part of her routinue.
We are experimenting together with styles – ‘afro puffs’ in 3 or 4 sections (one big one is their dream and we are almost there). They are also love plaiting their own hair, and are getting quite good at it. They love my wrapped looks, afro with a headscarf and have something to aspire towards.
I believe we are all better off – I’m getting to love my TWA, I kept some wigs handy for the a while – but now I honestly do feel much better with a head scarf tied to give my face height and definition, that with a wicked pair of earrings. All this gives me confidence and this ultimately is what my girls want to imitate.