Confessions of a Frustrated Woman

French Braids are my go-to hairstyle for hair-not-working hair days. Sometimes I wear french braids for weeks.

It’s true. I am frustrated with my hair. I can’t even lie. I know I said I’d probably opt out of the 3in6 challenge early but I had no idea that it would be quite this early. I tried to make it work and tried to work with my hair, but after a while I got particularly frustrated at not being able to properly comb through my hair, especially though the new growth. I could run a comb through but then the little coils would just snap back in place and that my friends was that. Things got busy with school and life and so I didn’t have much time to deal with my hair which I thought was fine because I was keeping my hair in protective hairstyles. Enter problem number 2, which for me was the even bigger problem. I have been unable to wash my hair clean. I kid you not. I’ve spent hours every week washing my hair and after a while I caved and went into the salon and paid someone else to wash my hair for me but I still felt like I was not getting my scalp clean and like I’ve mentioned before, I need to feel like my scalp can breathe and when it can’t I completely lose it. The itchy scalp and temporary dandruff does not help either.

So a couple weeks ago at the height of my frustration, I colored my hair. I chose to believe that it would ease some of the kink (big fat lie) and not be too harsh on my hair. Obviously that didn’t really work. So last week, I went further and flat ironed my hair, using piles of heat protectant. It took me just over an hour to do so. I had a wedding reception to attend, and I was not about to be photographed at this wedding looking like I did not put myself together well, it was bad enough that I wore work clothes to the reception (it was a mid-week wedding). Anyway, I could comb through the new growth for about 3 days following that before the springs reasserted their dominance  and the futility of my efforts. Last night I put my hair in four cornrows and today, and probably the rest of this week, I am rocking a wig and that’s just the way it’ll be.

In other news, my hair is growing and I can see that. I have been reading a lot about how relaxed and treated hair suffer breakage and appear to be able to only grow so long and that seemed to make sense because my hair was the same length for a period of about 10 years, but it’s growing and I can see that. However it is not growing evenly, which is interesting because typically uneven ends are an indicator of breakage and splitting, however, when I look at my hair I see mostly healthy ends, there are some split ends and knots, but not very much. If I pull hairs from the comb, I can usually see the roots. I’ve said this a million times, I shed hair like no-man’s business. My sister recently told me that she wants to move to a place where I can have my own bathroom because she doesn’t want to have to clean up my hair. All this to say, my hair has grown, unevenly but grown nonetheless and for that I am glad.

The back view of the french braids. These are a few days old and so a little rough but I like to switch up the parting and add accessories to liven up the look.

2 responses to “Confessions of a Frustrated Woman

  1. Its nice to know i'm not the only one who gets frustrated with my hair. on relaxed hair only growing to a point, I think you need to visit she has relaxed hair and has been growing it pretty well. her website also has a link to Tendai another Zimbabwean sister's website who is also having significant success growing out relaxed hair. I think at Phro's last length check she was at bra strap length. check them out for a few ideas on growing relaxed hair long.


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